Tag Archives: authenticity

To hell with you – just be real!

I feel the hot blazes of rage ravage inside of me, when I think about how most humans (and speaking from my experience, that is 99%) handle authenticity.

“Authenticity”, most believe, “surely is important, BUT…”

And I say: There is no „BUT“ that is any real but. Because basically there is no BUT. You are scared and you are only justifying your fears. But your fears are unsubstantiated. We all are meant to be authentic – absolutely authentic. Absolutely authentic. That is what we are. And if we are not, we are not ourselves. We are shadows. We are dead. We are empty. We are nothing. We are a shadow of our true selves. We are powerless, lonely, empty beings.

Why does noone get this? Why does noone seem to sense that when you are not authentic, when you are not true to yourself, when you hide yourself, that you are not being who you truely are? How can anyone believe that a lie is justified? It never is! I feel an all-consuming rage over this.

Every stupid person – and those are 99% – would be beat up badly right now, if I had a say in that. Of course they wouldnt be – NO WORRIES. I am the last person to harm anybody – I simply could not. Because that goes so much against my nature, and I simply cannot go against myself. But I so much would want to.

The retardedness of a belief system that makes it legitimate to lie and cheat on yourself is out of my willingness to grasp. I mean, I do understand how someone could be scared of retaliation and death and therefore decides to conform, but any person who actually believes that this is right, should be permanently have to live in a children cradle until they grow out of these retarded beliefs.

I am a being with the greatest sensitivity and therefore I know how people tick very well – often much better than the people themselves. I DO understand completely the „Why“ of it. But – still – the harm that people cause to themselves and others through all their inauthenticity is what makes me crinch in disgust and rage. It is so obvious!

And at least, at least, have some dignity, some integrity and dont justify what you are doing and go even so far as to demonize those who are doing it RIGHT. At least you humans – AT LEAST – go and respect those who are doing right. Because you know, that it is right. You – yes I fucking mean YOU – know that deep inside! You KNOW it. Dont be so childish as to think I would believe you for a second that you dont really know that. Stop these childish stupid attempts.

I am not your enemy (even though I might sound like one right now). I am well aware of what kind of emotional reactions my words might evoke in you.

My devilish angels. Really try to listen to your heart. See I love humanity. I really love you, love us all. I really do and I want the good for you – he he and for me. I want a world full of people that are truely true to themselves in their thought, speech and action. Cant you just relax for a moment and listen to that soul of yours? Just for a moment? Cant you sense the beauty of that thought? Cant you sense the beauty of a world where authenticity is the norm? Believe me, you just have a soul like I do. It is so beautiful. So so so so beautiful. So much love, so much power, so much dignity! You are all God. If you would know the beauty of your soul, you would understand my anger.

And also – even though you may not agree with my words – your soul is rejoicing in agreement to my message (of course not to my hatred or rage – your soul in fact loves you very dearly just as you are). So try to listen – try to listen – not so much to me, but to the message of your soul that speaks through my words which echo in your heart.

Believe me, I will never give up on you. I will always rather hate you, than not care at all. I will always speak the truth of my soul. I will always rather speak in rage than be silent. Believe me that my rage is love, that is just desperate right now. Believe me. Or dont believe me, but believe your soul. Ask your soul how important authenticity is for you? Ask your soul!

We are in a state where what you define as normal is not normal. Dont listen to the definitions of society of what is normal. Find the normal within you. Be real and be true. Dont wait until the weeks before you die to have this realization and annoy me with your regret. Go have it now! Own your life – own yourself.

As a FOOTNOTE I want to add, that I see rage as a important, empowering step on the way to realizing my true self. I dont believe that my current rage is all there will be heard about this. The intense energy of rage will transform itself inside of me … it actually already is transforming. So anybody who has a believe system that agrees with my rage, but believes that this rage is all that is. That this is how it is and that there is nothing we can do about it. Sorry, I am not interested in your sympathy. ALWAYS LOOK FOR THE LIGHT. Always reach for your power – which lies with your love and not your rage.

Especially when in such deep deep darkness – I am not interested in people who want to cuddle with me because they believe themselves stuck in the same darkness that I am in and want my companionship. I am growing – I wont be here for long. I am moving on, my sweethearts. And I am definitely not going to hang around with the likes of you.

Ha ha – that should have eliminated a great part of the few sympathy’s that this post might have evoked.

Much much much LOVE to you all. I really love you rascals, bastards and pessimists (I have to, otherwise I would have to hate my own rascal-, bastard- and pessimistness). We are all in it together. It is crazy, this journey. But I wouldnt have it any other way. LOVE!!!

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The reconciliation in the beauty of the little things

Today again once more, I have experienced how little moments of kindness, authenticity, generosity can reconcile me with human nature. For all the deep disappointment and pain I sometimes suffer, because I so much long for people to be kind, compassionate, generous, authentic, lively towards me and others and themselves (!) – something very little can make up for it. And sometimes I am really so fed up with humanity. So sad, that people are so dominated by their fears. But then a glimpse of beauty is all it needs of for reconciliation. I love the human heart so much. So much!

So glad for being born!

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I love myself. I am not perfect.

I make great and small mistakes. I have strengths and weaknesses. All my life I will try to develop the Good inside of me & I will never become perfect. I may sometimes imagine, that I am or should be perfect. But that is also just one of my many mistakes. I also love myself for not recognizing or caring about my own or others’ needs. Because even when I am this seperated from the world I am just trying to serve life. Tragically maybe, but not any less beautiful.

I may not always be how I or others wish me to be like. Still I am in every moment of my existence one hundred per cent lovable – exactly the way I am. And I love myself even more the more authentic and unique I am & the less I comply with anybody’s standards about the ideal human. Through my joys and pains, through my needs and fears I only become the unique being that I am. In my human heart divine love intertwines with mortal fear. And that is for what I love myself unconditionally.

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